"It looks like you don't need glasses," the doctor said, shutting off the eye exam machine.
"Oh good," I responded with a little laugh.
I wanted to say: Of course I don't need glasses. I got Lasik 2 years ago and it sure as hell better have worked. I paid three thousand dollars for these eyes. These eyes better not need glasses until I'm super old! Super super old! But I kept a smile on my face and nodded along with her. Yeah, I don't need glasses. I have 20/15 vision in my left eye and 20/20 in my right, but thanks for the reassurance.
"Ok, now we're going to dilate your eyes."
My face fell. "Wait, what?"
"I need to check the back of your eyes, so we're going to have to dilate them. Have you had this done before?"
The doctor looked at me like I'd never been to an eye appointment before. I've been going to the eye doctor yearly since before I can remember. I come from a family of bad eyes. I've lived through glasses and contacts, and I came out the other end cheering with my three thousand dollar eyes. I've had my eyes poked, cut, stabbed, lasered, eye-dropped, and contacted. Yeah, I've had them dilated before.
"How long does it last?"
"About 3 or 4 hours."
"Oh, well," I said, "I have work at 9."
My mind whirled for a moment. Maybe I could use this as an excuse to not work. I love not working. My lazy brain was looking forward to walking into work with sunglasses on and saying, "Sorry, I have to chill for a bit until my eyes are better." Or maybe they'd have me try to work anyway and I'd look like I had some fun the night before, sunglasses over my dreary eyes as I squinted at the computer screen.
No, that wouldn't do... so I rescheduled my appointment for next Friday. Yay.
Given the way the appointment started, I wasn't too surprised about this entire exchange. I showed up and they had me under my maiden name. I've been married for two years, why does the system insist on randomly popping up under my maiden name? Then I took a look at my chart and my first name was spelled wrong (not a surprise), and I swear they had my birthday in 1981, not 1987... but I didn't correct them. Whatevs.
Then it was off to work. Good old beautiful work. Thankfully I got my Saturday's worked out so I can do dog training starting next week. Yay! I talk A LOT at work and my throat's been hurting, though, so I hopped over to the Class Six and bought some Halls. I was exhausted by the time I got home, so it was computer time, movie time then TV time for me.
I also got to talk to Brandon! It's always the highlight of my night. I'm feeling like time is slowing down today... time, go faster!